One of the Evil Mad Scientists discovered that it is possible to use ask.com's search string suggestor to frighten yourself. Just type in an innocuous start to a question, and Ask will suggest umpteen possible ways for it to finish, chosen from the input of Ask's impressive cohort of users-too-dumb-to-just-use-Google.
This looked to me like a rich vein of entertainment waiting to be mined, so I had at it with a number of bland and innocent sentence-starters.
What is a metaphor? A metaphor is a tree in a golden forest.
(Coincidentally, that's also the meaning of life.)
Who is God? I'm betting on either Jeeves or the Vice President.
There's evidence pointing both ways.
Apparently, people really miss Jeeves.
Only the third-last one there actually worries me. But it's a biggie.
Hey, it's Metaphor Guy again!
And now I'm envisaging a freshly re-fertile woman sitting, hopefully, in a hot tub.
(I'm not sure where the frozen cheese fits in.)
After you leave home at 16, kid, this list contains a bunch of great suggestions for what to do with your life!
Look! It's the ask.com Magic 8-Ball!
I'm hoping this is just one really worried girl, and not a whole flock of 'em.
OK, now it's starting to get depressing.
I don't see why John Cena's marital status has anything to do with your plans to give him your bronchitis and pneumonia.
I think we've found the Words That Start All Questions From A Stoner...
...but now we're back in Scarytown.
(The Evil Mad Scientists are now running a competition for the best/worst ask.com suggestions!)
7 November 2007 at 4:56 am
Wow. That's a rich vein of stupid ye struck there pardner.
Can we breath liquid oxygen? Yes. Once, just once.
7 November 2007 at 5:18 am
I like "where is the golden spruce located" best.
Perhaps I can cheer you up with some Seriously Awesome Science... namely, the super mario theme played by two 7 foot tesla coils.
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=B1O2jcfOylU
7 November 2007 at 7:24 am
Our office discovered similar amusement courtesy of Google Suggest. For site-specific fun, try "Dan is...", etc.
7 November 2007 at 1:03 pm
If that gets boring (or depressing), you can always play google seppuku
warning: that particular comic is reasonably safe, others on the same site... not so much. In fact, in a frightening bit of recursion, some of them might be the end result of playing the aforementioned game.
3 February 2010 at 8:01 am
Autocompleteme.com is always good for a laugh